I wish

I wish I was a soldier
I wish I was occupied
I wish I was occupied with canons, and splashes of blood
and murdering in the name of my country
I wish I was a soldier
I wish I could be fighting for love
Not the kind that today is with you and tomorrow is a stranger
I wish I could fight for the love of my mother country
go from border to border resounding the sovereignty of country
though shamefaced by the corruptness of greedy politicians but proud to carry my weapon
proud to marry my weapon.

I wish
I wish I was a soldier
so I can fall in love and remain in it
fall in love with the loops of chaos, wars, and endless
military degenerates
at least I would know I am here for war, ever raging trouble, and the politicking of my comrades
I would have no reason guarding my heart and subtly always praying “I hope this one lasts”
I would know what to expect, in war you expect trouble, not uncertainties of peace that feels like home and suddenly you’re lost in the wilderness.

I wish I was a soldier
I would know there’s no promise of forever
at any moment my comrades could fall and I am prepared for that
I would know there’s no promise of roses, just guns and it doesn’t come with surprises
I wish I could fight for my country, knowing what I stand for, with whom, and for whom
that even if words are coded, I am already trained in the art of deciphering
I wish I was a soldier, I wish I could fight for love, love that is certain, love worth dying for.

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